Shopping spee again

Yesterday morning, I woke up at 11am. Ahhh! Late for one hour again?! I then check my hp but no one had called me or SMS me. Strange? I thought Jia Xing ask me to meet her at 10am? I then called her and she said that she has been waiting for my call since the time she woke up. Haiz..kns lor. Don't know how to call me and wake me up is it? I then re-scheduled the time to meet her at 1.30pm and went to get myself ready.

When I reach Tiong Bahru Plaza, I then called to ask where is she. She then told me she is queuing for the tickets and ask me to join her quickly. I then went to withdraw money before joining her. As I was late, the next "earliest" show was at 4pm. I then went to buy the tickets with her and proceed to play ParaPara. While I was playing, there are two girls standing outside of the window and look at me. But the way they look at me, it was as if that they are not happy with me lor. I don't know why. Liew! Wanna fight with me then say lah. Don't need to "diao" me until like that. I then choose the stage I want to play for the next round and stand aside to stare back at them. They then look at me, whisper to each other and one of them then gave me a hard stare before walking off. Jia Xing then ask me to relax myself. I then quickly went to continue my game. While I was playing, Jia Xing who stood behind me said,"Oei..u look around you and see how many people are looking at you". After I complete a stage, I turn around and there are 3 guys who stood outside the window to look at me, and another girl stood beside Jia Xing to look at me. I was thinking in my mind,"Liew! Siam leh!"and continue playing my game. I don't know why but I suddenly feel extremely irritate that day.

After I complete the whole game, I then walk away with Jia Xing and we head to "That CD Shop"and look at CDs. I then bought two classical CDs that cost abt $60 in total. Wah! First time spend such a bomb on classical CDs! But I have no choice cos one of the CDs, is a piano CD that I have been searching for a long time. After my god-brother send me a song of his to me, a song that I have been searching ever since I left my Primary school daze, I try to search for songs under his name and I finally found it. Haha! But quite expensive lah. The music playing in the store was oldies when we entered and Jia Xing comment that she hate the kinda song. As for me I also don't know how to appreciate that kinda song. Too bad.

After that we then went to "Ice Lemon Tea" to buy earrings. Now I know how Jia Xing wear her "strange" earring le! Haha! We then look around the shop and Jia Xing then ask me if I wanted to buy scarf for my black dress I wore the other day? I then ask the sales person which colour will suit black dress? She then recommend me to take either pink or baby blue. After some consideration, I decided to take the pink scarf. We then went to a shop and look at mp3, it was very expensive. Jia Xing then said she will take me somewhere else where it sells cheaper. We then went to watch "I not stupid 2". The movie was quite funny at the beginning but towards the end, it got very sad and I cried non stop. But I have learnt a so-called "meaningful" lesson from the movie.

After the movie, we then went to take a bus to Sim Lim Square. As most of the shops are closed, we then went to those shops which are open and look at the memory capacity of the mp3. At a shop, I almost took out my mastercard to pay for one of the mp3 which cost about $300+++. But Jia Xing keep asking me and use "eye signal" to ask me if I am sure I wanted the mp3 and ask me do I need to look around first before buying? I wanted to say,"No, I have decided to take this one"but she seems to drop me a hint to stop me from buying on impulse. I then look at her for awhile and again she gave me a look that seems to say,"Don't want. Don't buy first. You will surely regret"I then told the salesgirl that I will look around first and she said,"Okay". Jia Xing then quickly left the shop with me. After we went out, she said,"Lucky you never bought the mp3. Cos I tell you, I can help me to get a slightly cheaper price than that you know?"I then thank her for helping me to save my money. Haha. Cos I almost wanted to pay for that mp3 that I was eyeing. Cos the memory capacity was big enough for me to store at least 1000 songs. But seriously speaking, I don't know how to use a mp3 player. I know alot of you will say,"Huh?! You don't know how to use? Sure or not?"Cos I am an idiot to all these things. I then told her I wanted to buy a new discman instead as I don't know how to use a mp3 player. She then told me that mp3 is better as I dun need to change CDs so often and it's very light and easy to carry around. Ya I know..but I duno how to store songs inside -_-"

After that, while we were walking, she then told me things that broken my heart totally. She told me that it is what she felt after much observation(Please..don't go and SMS or ask her about it..just keep it quiet okay?)I then continue the rest of the journey with her keeping very quiet and thinking about alot of things. My heart was in pain...like a knife stab though it. I wanted to cry my heart out. I really wanted to cry after what she have said. But I couldn't. I could only "endure" the pain in my heart. I could only think,"Why am I such a fool"? Even though I know in the end I am the one who will receives the hurt most, why am I still doing things that I know will eventually caused myself to be hurt? I really don't know. I seriously don't know. Guys, tell me honestly, am I a fool? Am I stupid? Am I an idiot? It's okay. Just tell me straight. I want to know the TRUTH. If you think I am, just say it. I can understand and I will accept whatever you say. Cos I am now too blind to see what is happening around me. I don't know what is going on. Tell me! Just tell me! If I am really a fool/stupid/idiot, in what ways am I like that? What did I do to make you think I am like that? Tell me! Tell me! I wanted to know!

We then went to S-11 coffeeshop to have supper and Jia Xing could obviously sees that I am very unhappy. She then ask me,"What's wrong? Still thinking about the things that I told you just now?" I then nod and stare blankly. My mind and heart was not with the surroundings. I was thinking alot of things. She then receives a phone call asking her to go back home. I then told her to go back if she wants and I will go home myself. She said,"Are you sure? Are you okay now? You wanna go drinking to ease your pain?" I then shake my head and told her I am okay and will go back home. We then part ways and I walk around aimlessly to a bus stop and board 147. On the way, I keep thinking of what she had said to me and thinking alot of things. Why didn't I spot the signs? Why didn't I notice the changes? Why am I so stupid?! Why am I such a fool to what is happening around me? Why am I always the last to know whenever something happens? Why? Why? Why?

On the way home, I finally cried. It's really only a small matter. But why does it hurts me so much? Why? I really don't know? Am I too sensitive? Is it really my fault after all? I do not know now. I really don't know...I guess I have to end here. No mood to continue typing..sorry guys. Take care and enjoy your day! Please don't go and ask Jia Xing anything about this! Please! Just read it and forget it. Don't ask her anything. Okay?