BaoBei's Birthday

Went for K-Box at Marina Square to celebrate BaoBei's birthday yesterday. BaoBei says it was his most happiest day in his whole 23 yrs of his life. I only ate a little of the K-Box buffet that day. Took a lot of pictures and everyone was having fun.

BaoBei's birthday at K-box

BaoBei and ALL of his Delta Secondary School mates


Peace!

4n1 friends

5n1 friends

Group picture

BaoBei's female friends

*Kisses* BaoBei so 幸福!

BaoBei's Delta Sec Sch friends

BaoBei's male friends

Candide shot!

Act cute

Had a very long and fun day that day. Went for a few drinks after K-box. I am glad that BaoBei is happy that day.

Being my own self once again~

For the first time in my life, I have lost more than 1 friend. Or should I say friends?. .Because of that woman again! Yesterday, she called BaoBei wanted to talk to him about something which I don't know what...I then SMS her,"After scolding and shouting at people, u still have the cheek to call people to talk?!" She showed BaoBei this SMS and then she herself called BaoBei TO SHOUT AT HIS EAR! Very funny right? Bo Bian, "A" level student is like that mah. What to do?

I then SMS Esther to ask her why did she lied to me? I think she is with that woman at that point of time because she SMS me this,"She not scared le" what does she mean by that? I then said since she want to be with turtle, then from now on, no need to ask me out or whatever. She said that I am being childish. I don't know in others mindset but I am thinking, since me and Turtle are now enemies, and I don't like what she have said, that she has hurt me so deeply, and our arguements and our way of seeing things are never-ending and can never be understood, Esther and BaoBei are the ones that caught in the middle, in order to let this to end, I might as well give up so many years of friendship with Esther. Since she chooses Turtle as friend and I cannot get along with her well, sorry, I have no choice but to give up the years of our friendship.

I think I would rather be alone from now on. I don't like friends. People often say,"Strangers are friends who have not met" but now, I don't think so. Turtle used to be a stranger. After knowing her NOT even for a year, she can help destroy everything I have had by assuming things, and by being smart Alec.

I think I am being wrong by listening to what my teachers used to tell me. I just be how I used to be. Maybe, by being alone, I will be much more happier.

Celebration at "Lunar" club

Went to Lunar club yesterday to celebrate YanLing's birthday. I heard that it's a new club and went in for the first time yesterday. It's a upper high class of "KBox"

Part of our KTV room. It's the 3rd biggest room in the whole KTV

Yanling's Birthday cake

Inside of our KTV room. Can't really see the big room cos of the dim lighting effects.

Upper floor of the bar...sorry for the blur image cos I was rushing to take this picture while walking off

Entrance of Lunar club. I take this shot secretly cos the Bouncers are watching...

Yanling's Sunflower. I think her husband gave this to her

Our group picture. Of course we are not the only friends around

Our costume play - Funny!

Went back home after that. Had a very fun day but also BaoBei is not happy with her friends there that day cos he finds them very sarcastic. Heard that the cost of the room is not cheap! Like $2000+ to $3000 just for the room itself! Recently I also added two new guy friends to my msn. When BaoBei saw it, he was not very happy. I don't know why. Will end here for now. Blog again some other time.

Quarrel with BaoBei + Idiot Bitch!!! = Haiz...Give up everything bah..and just be my old self once again

Went to stay at BaoBei's place as usual. But this time, something was very different. Quarrel with BaoBei all because of that stupid woman!!!(Turtle aka MeiFong!) Just because she is ONE year older than us, so what?! Very big ah?! BaoBei keep saying that she was not in the wrong. I was thinking,"Okay lor! Since you wanna side THAT WOMAN, then no choice lor! I sometimes wonder THAT WOMAN is your gf or I am your gf?!"

Met Esther on Thursday because I work half day that day. And then.....I saw THAT WOMAN with her!!! I gave -_-" expression and Esther was like,"Are you okay? U don't mind I ask her out right? I thought you guys are okay le since this was so long ago?" Hello?! I will never ever forget what she said!!! And how she TWIST my words to BaoBei...Li hai! Very li hai! This person is more "cleverer" than a "A" level student! Until now, Turtle STILL don't know what she did wrong that I am so pissed off(I guess that is the most gentleness word for "Du lan"?). She can still SHOUT AT ME on my face that day,"What?! I know you are still angry about what I said about your job right?!" You imagine this scenario: She shout at me IN FRONT OF EVERYONE AT TAKASHIMAYA SHOPPING CENTRE that day! The day that WHAT she told me on phone at my workplace, I am already very angry. Then, I am MORE ANGRY when she go twist my words to BaoBei(which until now BaoBei still sides her). The most part, I am angry about this WHOLE incident, is that, right after this incident, I think...a day after? Turtle SMS BaoBei saying that she knows why BaoBei don't pick up her calls and don't reply her SMS. Is because of me. I am already 80% HOT when she said that! WHY?! Hello?! YenHao is YOUR BOYFRIEND or MINE?! Why?! He must 24-hour standby for YOUR SMS and PHONE CALLS?! Then I SMS her back to tell her NOT TO ASSUME THINGS! Since she likes to assume things so much, then I let her be! She then SMS BaoBei the SMS that I sent her and I got scolding from BaoBei and that is when he said this,"Don't poke your nose into our business can?! This is between me and her! So you don't be a busybody and SMS her on my behalf!" READ and RE-READ this sentence that BaoBei told me on the phone when I was on the way to his place. To a couple, in between a mutual friend, you go think about it what is wrong with this sentence and try figure it out WHY I am 100% angry that time! At that point of time I was thinking this in my head,"Into OUR business??? Between YOU and HER?! So you are saying that I am the third party? Or you are saying both of you are couples and I am just an outsider? Or that SHE IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND lah?"

At this point of time, my mind is total blank. All I could think in my head was this two words,"B-R-E-A-K U-P" But then again if Esther came to know about it, she will talk me out of breaking up. Which she already did once. So what BaoBei is rare breed? So what he is gentle? So what if he is....(Fill in your own words or impression of him) If he SIDES ANOTHER woman or women instead of his own gf, something must be wrong. Okay...assume that I really did something wrong that he feels that the other party is right but....I am a person who is extremely sensitive to WORDS! That is why, English dictionary have this sentence called,"MIND YOUR WORDS".

After quarrelling with BaoBei, when I want to walk out of his room door, he suddenly hug me very tight. Part of me feel like slapping him, kicking him, punching him etc, ANYTHING but to hug him back. But it was his hug that also made me feel at least a little bit better. S.H.E's song was right,"他还不懂" it sings about a guy she met in Korea, but that guy doesn't know what a girl really wants. Somewhere in the lyrics, she sings,"他还不懂，永远不懂，一个拥抱能代替。。(shou you)

But then, somehow I know...the feeling that I used to have towards BaoBei can never be the same again. I still love him but.......the kind of love is not the same anymore. I don't know how to explain what I am feeling now. Just that everything seems to go wrong. If I have to share BaoBei with another woman, I rather leave BaoBei. Some times, single is really better than attach. At least, problems that occur might not be so much and will not have such a big impact.

I will end here for now. Just blog to vent my anger and thinking. No one knows what I am thinking now. I wonder is that good or is that bad?

Thoughts about life, money, BaoBei....

I have been reading a book - Rich Dad's guide to financial freedom. It's more of a financial book about Investment, what's a good investment and bad investment etc. I then realize after reading half of the pages of the book, that I was and still am a fool in money!!! I am forever stuck in the E column. Those who read the book will understand what I meant. The book has 4 columns, E, S, B and I. E stands for Employee - People who work for money(Before you think,"Who doesn't?" Ah huh! That is the problem of people's mindset) S is for Self-Employed which is a category I wish to venture into if I really have the capital. These two are the left side of the money "game". These people work hard for money but ultimately in the end, whether they earn or lose, they will only find out only when they are face to face with death itself. But usually, for people like me, it's a sure lose situation. It's like you know 4D and Toto..you know chances of striking is either 1/10 or 50/50 yet you still throw like what? $100 a day or $2000 a week buying 4D or Toto NOT knowing whether you will win or not? In the end, if you never ever strike, you will lose all of your money that you buy that stupid ticket. But for S itself, it's not that they'll lose out forever. If they know how to go from S to I or S to B, they will someday become really rich. Provide if they are smart enough to know how to do "I" and how to run a "B".

After meeting Li Lian, I feel very down about life. I am really tired of living(Seriously). But Li Yi's advice was...something that says if I am tired, I should take a rest and then move on or something like that in an email. But the problem is, I tend to think a lot on things and on the future. I am constantly worried and fight for money. Recently, I met an old Uncle at my workplace. I pour my problems to him. This is his advice, see if you get what he meant: 钱来不要推, 钱走不要追!

He says from the day we were born, our destiny and fate has been determined by God himself. It is impossible for us to change our destiny and fate. I don't fully agree with his sentence, because I chose to believe in one thing, YOU can shape your own destiny and fate, by the LIFE CHOICES that you made in each phases of your life. I have made many, if not, a lot of WRONG choices in my younger life, now, I have nothing but to live in regret and a lot of,"What if I had done this? What if I have not done that? Would it make a lot of difference?"

My Mum walk by and saw me alone, she ask me questions about BaoBei. I knew it that she would definitely look down on him as she did to all my other exs. Because of one factor. I used to think that it's not important. The most important is a guy's heart and faithfulness but.....now as I grow up, I have learn some lessons the hard way...by my eyes and by my ears. Some times, by knowledge of other sources. After that, I realize one thing: Love really cannot survive in this world but money can. Though money can't buy true love, but you cannot deny that love itself has a lot of heartache. This is what I experience recently.

I have been thinking, since BaoBei likes to support that woman, I might as well let them be together. Though she don't like BaoBei and BaoBei have no emotional feelings towards her, but can someone explain to me this situation:

A and B are couple for 2 years. They met C through mutual friends. A and C used to get along well with each other, only have small quarrel occasionally but everything will be fine the next day or so that kind. Until one day, C said something that hurt A very much. A went to confide in B as usual every time A and C fights. Usually C will said things that are very sarcastic. BUT here is the problem:

Instead of comforting A as a boyfriend should, B instead, turn the tables around and make it seems as if A is in the wrong. On top of that, A realize something that B and her rest of her friend NEVER EVER notice. Whenever A and C argue or quarrel, B will always side C without fail no matter what situation. This time, A see the whole picture. Though they do not like each other but....something seems to be amiss whenever A quarrelled....and B, will never ever see her point of view.

End of story, although like I said, they are not together but since B as a boyfriend, always sides that other girl instead of his own girlfriend, doesn't that make her a indirect "3rd party"? I don't know what will you think?

I am very disappointed, very sad, I don't wish to hear, don't wish to see, don't wish to think and don't wish to know. Everything I do is wrong. No matter what....

Met Esther on Friday. I met her cos I knock off very early and since I haven't seen her for a long time, I decided to meet her. She has permed her hair...I am not used to it initially but now after some time, I felt it looks okay on her. Then.......I saw SOMEONE with her whom I do not wish to see...but is okay. She is entitled to be whomever she wishes to be. She said she thought that things have past so just forget it. Hello? Okay...I am petty! Okay?! I will never ever forget what she said. Everyone says she doesn't mean it or whatever shit! Or her pattern is like that blah blah blah. I know! But at the same time, I am doing this - MY ATTITUDE PROBLEM to let her see, that NOT EVERYONE can accept for her straight-forwardness especially NOT combined with her sarcastic remarks!!! NOT EVERYONE CAN ACCEPT!!! She likes who she is, that's her problem. If she thinks that WORDS DON'T KILL, I want to proof her wrong!!! She doesn't know who HuiYi is..she doesn't know why friendships on my side break very often!!! Because of one simple reason: THE WORDS YOU USE! Okay...since she doesn't know my example, how about Ivan's example?! What did she SAY to PISS IVAN OFF?! So Esther, you still think she doesn't mean it? You still think that WORDS DON'T KILL? Go and analyze and think about it. Or you experience the HURT you feel when you are with her and the WORDS she used on you, then you come and tell me again.

I will end here for now. Will blog again some other time.

Scary + thoughts about life + Outing with Wei Da

I don't know when is it exactly, that Adi thought of me as more than a friend. He is only a colleague outside of my workplace. He works as a technician at Standard Chartered Bank. Usually when I walk by, he will just smile at me or wave at him for greeting. As the months went by, we slowly started to chat with each other. Only recently, he start behaving rather strangely. At first I thought that maybe he like to crack jokes and joking around but later on, one incident made me realize that he may not be joking after all. Maybe because I am a wordy person, so whatever that he express towards me with his words, scares me. There was one time, when I went out with him alone, he said something that really scares me,"What if one day we became more than friends"? I told him that it would not happen because I already had a boyfriend and we planned to get married. He wish me all the best but then he said again,"If choi lah! One day if you and your boyfriend break, you tell me ah?" After chit-chat for certain minutes, although on the outside, he seems to be like a gentleman and respect me, but the things he said, made me really scared of him. I don't mind being his friend but at the same time I do not wish to mislead him that I accept what he says. I don't know how to express myself in a way that tells him,"Sorry, I only treat you as a friend. I already had a boyfriend whom I love very much and it is impossible that we will be together". Ride a motorbike for the very first time. Very scary lah!!!! I don't know how the hell can HuiYi used to ride a motorbike till she told me that when she take bus, she said she is not used to it. KNS!!! REALLY SCARY LAH!!!!

On the way to meet BaoBei's friends yesterday, a lot of thoughts went through my mind. Before that, BaoBei's Mum keep on nagging at me and said to me a lot of things that made me feel very stress. I am already stress up at work, by my parents and friends plus a lot of things!!!! Why can't she just give me a break? Everything that BaoBei do or NOT do, I will always be the one who is at the receiving end of her scoldings and hurtful words! Sometimes I am very tired about life, about my family, about what BaoBei do and everything. From young until now, I have been seriously reflecting about my life and what I really want? Some times, I just want to fly out of Singapore and stay at a foreign country and maybe lived there alone. Some times, I just wanted to end my life to end everything once and for all. There was a time, MingWei's MSN extension nick type this,"Suicide is a PERMANENT solution to a TEMPORARY problem" I really wish to type this in my extension nick but I don't know if Lorraine will scold me,"Suicide is a PERMANENT and ONLY solution to a ON-GOING problem" I don't know how long I can be with BaoBei. I had told him one day,"If ever I leave you one day, either it is because you have done something wrong that hurt me deeply or it is plainly because I can't stand of your Mum anymore!" I can't see myself getting along with her even before marriage. What makes him think that I could ever get along with her after marriage. She may sound simple that she hate me becuase I didn't do housework, but I know myself too well, that there is more to it than meets the eye. I am really very tired..not only physically. If anyone knows what I meant.

Went out with Wei Da, Zhen Ni, Zhen Ni's boyfriend, Ah long and a girl whom I had never seen before but I don't bother to ask about her for intro. Her legs are slimmer than me!!! KNS! Went to esplanade to eat Xiao Peng's food. He sells western food and the price is really cheap compared to Anson's or any other western stall and it is value for money. Li Yi, next time if we had the chance, I will bring you there to try his food. If you are into pasta and meat. It is not very expensive but it is outdoor kind of enviroment. His most expensive dish is $14.90 I think?

This is the steak that Xiao Pang cook. Price is $11.90

After that they went to play pool and I sit there to play with PSP. I don't know how to play pool. We then went home after that...