I don't know when is it exactly, that Adi thought of me as more than a friend. He is only a colleague outside of my workplace. He works as a technician at Standard Chartered Bank. Usually when I walk by, he will just smile at me or wave at him for greeting. As the months went by, we slowly started to chat with each other. Only recently, he start behaving rather strangely. At first I thought that maybe he like to crack jokes and joking around but later on, one incident made me realize that he may not be joking after all. Maybe because I am a wordy person, so whatever that he express towards me with his words, scares me. There was one time, when I went out with him alone, he said something that really scares me,"What if one day we became more than friends"? I told him that it would not happen because I already had a boyfriend and we planned to get married. He wish me all the best but then he said again,"If choi lah! One day if you and your boyfriend break, you tell me ah?" After chit-chat for certain minutes, although on the outside, he seems to be like a gentleman and respect me, but the things he said, made me really scared of him. I don't mind being his friend but at the same time I do not wish to mislead him that I accept what he says. I don't know how to express myself in a way that tells him,"Sorry, I only treat you as a friend. I already had a boyfriend whom I love very much and it is impossible that we will be together". Ride a motorbike for the very first time. Very scary lah!!!! I don't know how the hell can HuiYi used to ride a motorbike till she told me that when she take bus, she said she is not used to it. KNS!!! REALLY SCARY LAH!!!!
On the way to meet BaoBei's friends yesterday, a lot of thoughts went through my mind. Before that, BaoBei's Mum keep on nagging at me and said to me a lot of things that made me feel very stress. I am already stress up at work, by my parents and friends plus a lot of things!!!! Why can't she just give me a break? Everything that BaoBei do or NOT do, I will always be the one who is at the receiving end of her scoldings and hurtful words! Sometimes I am very tired about life, about my family, about what BaoBei do and everything. From young until now, I have been seriously reflecting about my life and what I really want? Some times, I just want to fly out of Singapore and stay at a foreign country and maybe lived there alone. Some times, I just wanted to end my life to end everything once and for all. There was a time, MingWei's MSN extension nick type this,"Suicide is a PERMANENT solution to a TEMPORARY problem" I really wish to type this in my extension nick but I don't know if Lorraine will scold me,"Suicide is a PERMANENT and ONLY solution to a ON-GOING problem" I don't know how long I can be with BaoBei. I had told him one day,"If ever I leave you one day, either it is because you have done something wrong that hurt me deeply or it is plainly because I can't stand of your Mum anymore!" I can't see myself getting along with her even before marriage. What makes him think that I could ever get along with her after marriage. She may sound simple that she hate me becuase I didn't do housework, but I know myself too well, that there is more to it than meets the eye. I am really very tired..not only physically. If anyone knows what I meant.
Went out with Wei Da, Zhen Ni, Zhen Ni's boyfriend, Ah long and a girl whom I had never seen before but I don't bother to ask about her for intro. Her legs are slimmer than me!!! KNS! Went to esplanade to eat Xiao Peng's food. He sells western food and the price is really cheap compared to Anson's or any other western stall and it is value for money. Li Yi, next time if we had the chance, I will bring you there to try his food. If you are into pasta and meat. It is not very expensive but it is outdoor kind of enviroment. His most expensive dish is $14.90 I think?
This is the steak that Xiao Pang cook. Price is $11.90After that they went to play pool and I sit there to play with PSP. I don't know how to play pool. We then went home after that...
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