Stupid Boss! + Insecurities = Fears

Nothing much happen at work today. Derek came late for work. His face was super black when he came in! I tried to greet him but he just walk past me. Okay...never mind *shrugs* Derek finally said out what he tolerated for so long - He wish to resign. I think Boss was taken aback by what Derek said and then sort-of "Phycho" him, not to leave. In the end, Derek said he decided to continue to stay on *Fainted!* I wish him all the best since he decided to continue to stay.

Never had I ever met such an unreasonable(and I mean super duper unreasonable!!!) Boss in my whole life before! I was hoping that I could leave this "Prison" place! I had enough! My patience is not as good as Derek's! I do hope that my Boss learns his "lesson". Just because you employee is soft-spoken, patient or tolerating, doesn't mean that you can abuse them! Seriously, the way he treated us, if he were to meet another employee who couldn't stand him and knows how to fight back, the employee could sue him for abuse! Humph! Haiz....enough is enough.

Actually, ever since that incident, I don't wish to blog anymore. It's my own blog!!! Yes, Lorraine still say,"Mind your words you use in your blog cos you might hurt someone". I know. That is why I now decided to make my blog so-called "Private" cos I couldn't keep track and I don't know who exactly has been viewing my blog? Yesterday's Channel U talks about blogging. They describe blogger of 3 attitudes:

1)A blogger who blogs about anything and everything of his/her life(ME!)

2)A blogger who only blogs Generally("on the surface" type)

3)A blogger who blogs fake things to gain attention(-_-")

There is this stupid guy on TV, he said,"I think those people who blog everyday are either "Bo Liao" or nothing better to do so they keep blogging" I feel like throwing something on his face!

Talk with BaoBei and HuiYi after that. Somehow, my feelings towards BaoBei is no longer the same. I know he is disappointed in me. Sorry, maybe I just don't know how to love someone. Lately, he keep joking about looking for another girlfriend. But if it ever come to pass, I won't say anything, but will let him go. Seriously speaking, if a person who won't mind looks, BaoBei is really a very good catch! Somehow, the more good looking BaoBei become, the more insecure I feel. It's not that I don't like him to dress-up or style himself. But because of my split-personality thing, I don't know how to explain my own feelings.

I love it now that BaoBei has become more good-looking and when Esther Leong once comment,"Wah! YenHao! You've become handsome le leh!" Part of me feel very proud that someone gave BaoBei a positive affirmation, which is true, especially he wears contact lens and that he style his hair to Amani. But another part of me feel very insecure and depress. Cos good-looking guys usually attract girls attention! There was once when we board MRT, a few teenage girls(some whom are quite pretty) would steal glances at BaoBei. But when they notice that I started to glare at them, they look away. BaoBei didn't notice the girls. I don't know how would any other girls feel if some other girls were to look at their boyfriend? But to me, I feel insecure instead of feeling proud. I know Pastor taught in "Making marriage work" before that we should look good for our partners. But...now that it happens to me, I don't feel comfortable with it. I know BaoBei tried his very best to lose weight and to look good just for me, I am happy. But at the same time, I feel lousy about myself. A lot of What ifs...came to my mind.

Went to join CGMs for lantern thingy. Most of them were having fun. On the way, I talk to Jaslyn about work and Derek a lot. She was very agitated that Derek hides things from her. Oops! She didn't know?! I'm in big trouble now! I don't know what to do?

I think I will end here for now. Will blog again some other time...