Health

I am considered on the way to recovering. Fall sick on Tuesday but I still went to work anyway. My bad cough came back(sian~!) and I was down with fever for two days. But still I went to work. No, no. It's not that I had to, but because I am the only admin staff there. Why can't they get a replacement to replace me? I tried to hide the fact that I am sick, from my Boss. But I keep having runny nose and he ask me to see a doctor. He pay for my medical fees cos I said I don't have money to see a doctor.

I am envious of the people around me who don't have money problems. Maybe because they know how to save. Aidah said she'll mail me the brochure about F&B course. She said if I were to take the course outside, I would have to pay $2000+ just for the school fees alone. She ask me to register to become a NTUC member, so that I could get subsidise, and the school fees I would be paying will be a lot of difference! I don't know how to go through with this, maybe have to ask for help. She encourage me to further my studies and pursue the course that I really want.

When I was alone at the office yesterday, I was very depress thinking of money problems, BaoBei and studies. My thoughts somehow drift towards pen-knife(if you know what I am thinking?). No, don't worry for me. I won't do it. It takes a lot of courage for a person to do that. Pen-knife is my ex-drug. I said drug because, if you notice people with multiple cuts, it's because they are addicted in cutting themselves. Yes, it's extremely painful. They cut themselves not because of the pain. Is the feeling they get AFTER the pain. It's a relieve after pain kind. The feeling is like, part of your problems are flowing out together with your blood. So you "feel" less burden. But at the same time, I realize that this is not the option. I didn't manage to do it, cos I keep thinking of HuiYi's worried look when I told her before that I used to cut myself, and the promise that I told her that I won't do it. Anyway, I also thought of how would BaoBei reacted if he were to see cuts on my hand?

My SL-God-Mother plan a surprise for me! She bought me a wedding gown at L$2500?!(US$9.74). But she was very unhappy with the fact that BaoBei and me engaged in SL without her permission. Oops! I didn't formally introduce BaoBei to her, so I understand how she feels. More and more new faces began to join the club. I realize that I am uncomfortable with new people in both SL and RL case. Still, chatting to people in SL is a lot more easier than chatting with people in RL.

I think I will end here for now. Will blog again some other time.